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Confession of a fallen angel

There was nothing extraordinary or romantic in the way those two met. No intriguing online dating, no crazy friends party and not even cheeky meek smile in a pub or supermarket. He met her on a usual cold winter day at the most common and yet the most inappropriate for any romance place. And they actually haven’t thought of any kind of romance between them. Still… they managed to get together.

He was special for her and she loved everything about him. Well, almost everything… Nobody is ideal at the end of the day!
He…. He loved her too, even though he was never brave enough to admit it. He considered her being a bit moody but he thought he knew her and understood her… But did he really?

Could he possibly know whether she was his little Angel or a Belial? Could he even guess what was on her mind in those minutes of silence? Did he wonder if she ever lied to him? Who was she with when he wasn’t around? Did he meet her to become finally happy or turn his life in to more misery? And will he suffer when she leaves him...?

No, she didn’t want to leave him, but her mind was so fickle. She was afraid of herself, of her own reality, her feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but she knew that love hurts and feelings are disturbing. She taught herself not to be attached to memories, places, people…. And now, when she met him, her world has turned up side down. She loved him, but she didn’t believe in eternal love. She wanted to set him free but she was too possessive for it.
She lived double life, followed double standards, deceiving everyone, deceiving herself… Yes, her life was full of contradictions, but now she knew one thing for sure - she needed him and she wanted to become a better person, be content, to make him happy. Yet, will she be able to achieve it or her dark side is going to take over at the end? Is she a hero or villain of the novel? Nobody knows. I can’t wait to get to the end of the book.

Comments

Anonymous said…
We all go through this suffering, and you have to wait and wait to come to the end by turning the pages of your book.
Everyone has only 24 hours, do what you really like/wish to do.
Very nice story , lyrical and romantic and mystical.
You are really improving.
Anna Kei said…
For the first comment.... I think you misunderstood the idea. This piece is not about suffering, but about changes, complications and most of all - happiness :)
For Alex Shemshurenko - thank you :) I always appreciate your feedback ;) x

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